WINGHAM, Near Sandwich, Kent, Next to Blasingstone-on-Avon England—A potentially embarrassing iPhone 10 video in which Paul McCartney is seen attempting to buy marijuana in the rural village of Wingham, Kent, is in the sweaty hands of local authorities. Those of you who haven’t vaped your brains out completely yet may recall a typically vain announcement, released nearly four-and-a-half years ago, in which the terminally unhip Mr. McCartney announced that he had quit smoking weed because he didn’t want to set a bad example for his children and grandchildren.
In the video, which was taken by a weather cam atop the Wingham McDonald’s, Mr. McCartney is signaling from a taxi to an unseen person or persons on the main thoroughfare in delightfully rural Wingham, located six miles east of Canterbury on the A257 Canterbury to Sandwich Road.
“When he got into my taxi, he didn’t give me an address or a destination,” said Kevin O’Leary, whom Wingham police were able to identify as the driver of the taxi after viewing the weather cam footage.
“He handed me four £20 notes and asked me to drive him around the village,” Mr. O’Leary continued. “He mumbled something about having been there with his wife on holiday once.”
After a few minutes Mr. McCartney began behaving strangely, said Mr. O’Leary.
“He was just sitting in the back humming to himself when suddenly he rolled down the window and began signaling to someone on the street. He had one hand on top of his head and was waving his other hand. After he had waved at a few people, he began asking if anyone knew where his friend Mary Jane lived.”
Although Mr. O’Leary didn’t attach any significance to Mr. McMartney’s behavior, local constable, Geoff Mills, did.
“We’ve got almost identical footage of George Michael cruising through Wingham once,” said Constable Mills. “Later we found him slumped over the wheel of his car. The vehicle reeked of cannabis, and after we had revived Mr. Michael, he told us that Wingham is a popular destination for wealthy London celebrities looking to purchase cannabis. I guess Kent isn’t known as the Garden of England for nothing.”
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