You Can’t PhotoShop This – postcards from the pug bus

A Barrel of Laughs at the Gastroenterology Office: You Can’t Photoshop This

philmaggitti 472 Views 2 min read

WEST GOSHEN, Pa.—When was the last time you had a good laugh in the gastroenterology office? A really good laugh, not some tight-ass snortle, but a full-on, stuff-coming-out-your-nose production? I didn’t think so. There’s more laughter at funerals than at the gastro’s. Of course people who attend funerals usually don’t spend the night before shoving M80s up Read More

You Can't PhotoShop This

Pumpkin Spice Motor Oil: You Can’t Photoshop This

philmaggitti 396 Views 0 min read

WEST CHESTER, Pa.—What’s next? Beef jerky? Cabbage? Toothpaste? Kitty litter? Toilet paper? Condoms? Quiche? Marmite? Sushi? Goulash? Potato chips? Driveway sealer? Edamame? Marijuana? Edible underwear? Fish sticks? Hamburger Helper? Glasses cleaner? Umbles? FYI: According to the Chicagoist, “1996 brings the first reference we can find to pumpkin spice coffee, the beginning of pumpkin spice’s downfall.” © Read More

You Can't PhotoShop This

What Would Nixon Do? You Can’t Photoshop This

philmaggitti 390 Views 1 min read

We were watching the Villanova-Temple game last night, half paying attention to an interview with a former Temple player, half poking around on our tablets, half sucking on a phatty, when what to our wandering eyes should appear but the accompanying image. “Holy fucking shit,” we sputtered, “that’s funny.” Then we got to thinking: what, Read More

You Can't PhotoShop This

Colleges Offer Halloween Costume Counseling: You Can’t Photoshop This

Biff Scuzzy 415 Views 2 min read

WEST GOSHEN, Pa.–Not content with declaring war on date rape, Columbus Day, free speech, men who urinate standing up, and other impediments to the establishment of the nanny state/matriarchal society, colleges have taken dead aim on Halloween, a day fraught with the perils of political incorrectness. The State University of New York at Geneseo and Read More

Politics You Can't PhotoShop This

All-White Diversity Philly Magazine Cover: You Can’t Photoshop This

philmaggitti 411 Views 1 min read

PHILADELPHIA—What do you get when a magazine runs a cover story about diversity in Philadelphia’s public schools and the photo of cherubic elementary school kids on the cover includes nary a brown, black, beige, tan, yellow, red, brindled, or burnt umber face—just seven cheerful white kids sitting on a low-slung brick wall, their iPhones and Read More

You Can't PhotoShop This

Pope Gets His Ass Grabbed: You Can’t Photoshop This

philmaggitti 391 Views 1 min read

What sack! What glorious, unalloyed sack! Pope don’t support gay marriage? Pope thinks guy-on-guy reach-arounds are a sin? Gay dude gets cheeky with Da Pontiff’s right cheek. Considering the pope’s eighteenth-century views on women, it’s a wonder that the only chick allowed near His High and Mightiness in this photo didn’t yank the Papal Pee-pee Read More

Politics You Can't PhotoShop This

Black Lives Matter: You Can’t Photoshop This

Biff Scuzzy 438 Views 1 min read

WEST GOSHEN TOWNSHIP, Pa.–Members of Fuk Yo Flag, a wholly owned subsidiary of Black Lives Matter, have taken to videos and blog posts to “suggest” acts of violence and thuggery on September 11. After posting a video recently that called for “open season on killing white people and cops,” a man who identifies himself as Read More