Celebrities

LOS ANGELES – Charlie Sheen has voiced a cautionary note about the use of magic mushrooms to combat depression, anxiety, and drug dependence. In spite of positive reports from Johns Hopkins researchers about the potential of mushrooms to effect long-lasting, positive changes in mood and behavior, Mr. Sheen warns against “looking for a shortcut” to Read More

MALIBU – Any news report that begins with the words “Jessica Simpson thinks” is bound to raise eyebrows. The last time Ms. Simpson thought, at least for the record, she told reporters she wanted to adopt a baby in Mexico because she loved the Mardi Gras tradition. Undaunted by the incredulous silence that greeted her Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Jennifer Aniston, recently chosen by Entertainment Tonight viewers as the star who best represents American values, held a brief press conference yesterday to thank her supporters “for this meaningful honor.” Ms. Aniston finished ahead of Reese Witherspoon, Tom Cruise, Johnny Depp, Clay Aiken, George Clooney, Jennifer Garner, Angelina Jolie, Julia Roberts, and Brad Read More

LOS ANGELES – The Paris Hilton stalker who turned up at her father’s office carrying a knife last week has become an overnight cause celebre in Hollywood. The well-dressed, soft-spoken young man, described by one supporter as “seriously hot,” talked his way into Mr. Hilton’s office after telling the receptionist he was Ms. Hilton’s fiancé. Read More

MALIBU – Britney Spears has thrown her weight behind a national initiative to restrict driving privileges for sixteen-year-olds. The once-and-future mother announced yesterday that she is “like totally in favor of” laws that restrict sixteen-year-old drivers from carrying passengers, driving while eating a sandwich, and driving while having sex, including oral sex, which many teenagers Read More

HOLLYWOOD – The Feed Lindsay Lohan campaign gathered critical mass today, Lohan’s nineteenth birthday, with the addition of the United Nations, the Hunger Project, and Carl’s Jr. fast food chain to the list of international organizations dedicating their resources to preventing Lohan from starving herself to death. “We cannot allow this talented young actress, who Read More

LONDON – Actress Pamela Anderson, who is thirty-nine today, admitted she was promoting more than one cause when she stripped in the window of designer Stella McCartney’s Mayfair boutique in support of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animal’s campaign against the use of fur in fashion. “Of course I was there to help PETA Read More

MALIBU – Britney Spears issued a brief press release yesterday explaining her decision to appear naked in the August issue of Harper’s Bazaar. According to Ms. Spears, her choice was “the next logical step” in her campaign “to keep it real for my fans.” The first step in that campaign, Ms. Spears’ decision to do Read More

SYDNEY – Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban began their honeymoon yesterday, accompanied by several accountants, lawyers, financial advisors, and a “mutually acceptable” arbitrator. Some rumors had the honeymoon party bound for Fiji, while other sources said the group was headed for Bora Bora instead, but by all accounts the newlyweds were eager to start their Read More

SWAKOPMUND, Namibia – Standing proudly in front of a large banner that read “Mission Accomplished,” Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt waved to a cheering crowd of body-guards, personal servants, and security experts prior to departing Namibia. Ms. Jolie and Mr. Pitt, dressed in military fatigues, were accompanied by their children—Maddox, Zahara, and Shiloh Nouvel—who were Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Tom Cruise has charged Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt with exploiting their newborn daughter, Shiloh Nouvel, “to wage a multimillion-dollar publicity campaign to bolster their careers.” Mr. Cruise made these charges in an op-ed piece entitled “What Price Publicity?” in today’s New York Times. “Brangelina’s constant, manic travel and their grandstanding for ‘goodwill causes’ Read More

SWAKOPMUND, Namibia – Angelina Jolie has created an endowment to fund the purchase of domain names for Namibian children. Ms. Jolie, the Goodwill Ambassador for the United Nations High Commission for Refugees, created the endowment to “level the playing field in chat rooms and on message boards for Namibian kids,” said a Jolie spokeswoman. According Read More

REPUBLIC OF BRANGELINA – Angelina Jolie, president of the newly formed African Republic of Brangelina, has instructed her ambassador to the United States, Brad Pitt, to send a formal letter of diplomatic inquiry to President George W. Bush. According to a source close to Ms. Jolie, the couple is seeking the same kind of diplomatic Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Once again a book has come between author Nicole Richie and her ex-fiance Adam Goldstein. Ms. Richie, 24, and Mr. Goldstein, 33, were engaged in February last year; but he called it quits in December, one month after the publication of Ms. Richie’s first novel, The Truth about Diamonds. Apparently Truth contained too much “truth” about Read More

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – The campaign to spay Britney Spears, launched yesterday by Postcards from the Pug Bus, southeastern Pennsylvania’s leading satirical website, has gained three important endorsements. According to Pug Bus editor in briefs, Phil Maggitti, the American Kennel Club (AKC), the Mensa Society, and the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) have expressed their Read More