Celebrities

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – A campaign to spay Britney Spears has been launched by Postcards from the Pug Bus, southeastern Pennsylvania’s leading satirical website. According to Pug Bus editor in briefs, Phil Maggitti, “At the rate Ms. Spears is reproducing, she and her offspring will give birth to thousands of babies, who will more than Read More

LOS ANGELES – After the birth of her daughter Rowan three years ago, Brooke Shields suffered a crippling case of postpartum depression, which she chronicled in her book Down Came the Rain. Her efforts to help other women with similar problems earned her a broadside from Scientologist Tom Cruise, who belittled her endorsement of psychiatry and Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Nicole Richie told Vanity Fair that she did not screen Paris Hilton’s career-making sex tape, “1 Night in Paris,” for some of their friends at a Los Angeles party. According to a longstanding Hollywood rumor, Ms. Hilton’s celebrated feud with Ms. Richie began in January 2005 when Ms. Hilton arrived at a party where Ms. Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Tom Cruise and Brooke Shields have buried the olive branch and extended the hatchet, putting paid to their feud about the value of psychiatry and antidepressants. Yet if looking well is the best revenge, Mr. Cruise has clearly taken one in the shorts from Ms. Shields, whom he went out of his way Read More

NEW YORK – Britney Spears paid a surprise visit to yesterday’s taping of the “Late Show with David Letterman” in New York to deny rumors that she is bearing Mr. Letterman’s child. A spokesman for the CBS show said Ms. Spears’ brief visit, which had been arranged earlier in the day, was a surprise to Read More

HOLLYWOOD – A Tom Cruise backlash appears to have queered the box office for Mr. Cruise’ latest film Mission Impossible 3, which failed to measure up to expectations last weekend. MI3 earned roughly $48 million, domestic, making it No. 1 with a bullet, but the bullet was aimed at its feet. Domestic box office for MI3 had been expected to Read More

MALIBU – Jennifer Lopez, whom People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals has attempted to make the butt of its anti-fur campaign, responded by announcing the intro-duction of the Jennifer Lopez Combination Grill and Small Animal Crematorium. “Each year the bodies of hundreds of thousands of perfectly healthy small animals harvested for the fashion industry Read More

MALIBU – Britney Spears has fitted her husband Kevin Federline with a microchip, hoping to accomplish with technology what she couldn’t accomplish with sex, automobiles, or childbirth. The device—a transponder, actually—was implanted between Mr. Federline’s shoulder blades recently. “Thousands and thousands of husbands run off each year and are never returned to their homes because Read More

LOS ANGELES – Britney Spears will hold a press conference at the Los Angeles Convention Center today. Barring the capture of Osama bin Laden, the premature birth of Angelina Jolie’s baby, or the discovery of intelligent life in the White House, Ms. Spears will be the top news story. As of this morning Ms. Spears Read More

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards and Harvard sophomore Kaavya Viswanathan will turn to the courts to seek redress for their current misfortunes, The Wall Street Journal reported this morning. Mr. Richards suffered a concussion when he fell out of a coconut tree at the Wakaya Club resort in Fiji. Ms Viswanathan suffered loss Read More

MALIBU – Author Nicole Richie has lashed out at Kaavya Viswanathan, calling the Harvard sophomore a literary fraud for plagiarizing large parts of Megan McCafferty’s Sloppy Firsts and Second Helpings. In a sharply worded statement released through her literary agent, Ms. Richie said, “What Ms. Viswanathan did is worse than showing up at a club wearing a dress Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Charlie Sheen said in a prepared statement yesterday that he is not presently nor has he ever been a homosexual. Mr. Sheen’s denial came in response to accusations leveled at him by his estranged wife, Denise Richards, who charged that Mr. Sheen threatened to kill her, abused prescription drugs, gambled compulsively, and snorted Read More

NEW YORK – Julia Roberts has been ordered by a New York judge to stay at least three hundred feet from the Bernard B. Jacobs Theatre, where Three Days of Rain, the play in which Ms. Roberts made her Broadway debut last Wednesday, is being presented. The restraining order was granted yesterday at the request of Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Tom Cruise took time out from making a placenta casserole to visit with a Yahoo chat room audience last night. During the scheduled fifteen-minute session, sponsored by Yahoo News and Placentavite shampoo, Mr. Cruise answered several questions, about his religion and his past lives. The first questioner, TomKat45903 from Akron, Ohio, asked Mr. Read More

HOLLYWOOD – Universal Pictures has acknowledged that the ending of The Break Up, a romantic comedy starring Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn, has been rewritten. The studio decided on a do over, said Universal spokesman Ralph Gould, after test audiences had reacted badly to the original ending. In that version the characters portrayed by Ms. Aniston Read More