Celebrities

Celebrities

Britney Spears New Son Revives Spay Campaign

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – The campaign to spay Britney Spears, launched in May by Postcards from the Pug Bus, southeastern Pennsylvania’s leading celebrity satire website, was given renewed life yesterday when Ms. Spears delivered her second son. “This is the leg up our campaign needs,” said Phil Maggitti, editor in

Celebrities

Suri Cruise Photos Expected to Fuel Stock Market Rally

NEW YORK – The publication of the first pictures of Suri Cruise should drive many stock prices higher, financial analysts predict. The long-anticipated images, featured in an exclusive twenty-two-page spread in the October issue of Vanity Fair, hit newsstands in New York and Los Angeles today and in other markets next

Celebrities

Tom Cruise Demoted to Dwarf Object Status by IAU

PRAGUE – The International Astronomical Union (IAU) adopted a resolution Thursday that effectively strips Tom Cruise of his status as a Hollywood planet. The controversial resolution was adopted after an initial proposal to add three new planets to the Hollywood solar system—Pamela Anderson, Mr. Cruise’ moon Jamie Fox, and the

Celebrities

Tom Cruise Dumped by Paramount Because of Annoying Laugh

LOS ANGELES – Paramount Pictures has ended its fourteen-year relationship with Tom Cruise and his production company, El-Ron Universal, because of Mr. Cruise’ annoying laugh. The move was announced yesterday by the chairman of Viacom, the company that owns Paramount. “A much as we like Tom personally,” said Viacom chairman,

Celebrities

Lindsay Lohan Aims to Support U.S. Troops in Iraq

HOLLYWOOD – Lindsay Lohan told Elle magazine that she wants to follow in the footsteps of her idol, Marilyn Monroe, by “entertaining our brave fighting men one soldier at a time.” In a penetrating interview that lands like a smart bomb on newsstands today, the Herbie Fully Loaded actress said, “I want to do

Celebrities

Britney Spears Still Believes Iraq Had WMDs

MALIBU – Count Britney Spears among the growing number of Americans who believe Saddam Hussein possessed weapons of mass destruction as recently as 2003. According to a Harris Poll released July 21, half of all respondents—up from 36 percent last year—said they believed Mr. Hussein had WMDs when President Bush

Celebrities

Britney Spears Gets Apology from National Enquirer’s Pecker

BOCA RATON, Fla. – The National Enquirer‘s chief executive, David Pecker, confirmed that his organ’s British and Irish editions had apologized to Britney Spears for publishing two stories that claimed Ms. Spears and her husband Kevin Federline were getting divorced. The rare apology and retraction came after Ms. Spears had threatened

Celebrities

Jessica Simpson Launches Book-of-the-Year Club

LOS ANGELES – Jessica Simpson believes Oprah’s Book Club puts too much pressure on its members. In a recent Maxim interview Ms. Simpson declared, “People who lead active lives don’t have time to read a book every month. What with going to the gym and the tanning salon, getting manicures, pedicures, and

Celebrities

Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes Present Baby Suri Hotline

HOLLYWOOD – Tom Cruise has finally responded to growing speculation that his alleged daughter Suri does not exist. Mr. Cruise announced yesterday through the pubic relations office at the Scientology Centre in Hollywood that he has authorized the centre to establish a Baby Suri hotline to provide the press and