WEST GOSHEN, PA—Today we sing the praises of the one-hit wonder (OHW)—pop music’s most prodigious benefactor, the artist who keeps on giving even after he or she or them or it is no longer selling and is setting the GPS for Branson. Yet there is power in the relevance of the irrelevant, my fellow babies, and much to be admired in those who dared to be forgotten. In their honor we present this quiz. (Trigger warning: there are wrong answers, lots of them, just like in real life, watch your ass.)
1. Which OHW of the 1950s contained the following lyrics: “Sha na na na, sha na na na, na, Dip dip dip dip dip dip dip . . .”?
a} all of them, b) every other one, c) “Get a Job” (1958), d) “Heartbreak Hotel” (1955)
2. The forgotten entity who sang the OHW “Judy in Disguise (With Glasses)” (1968) used which of his names as his stage name?
a) his first and middle, b) his middle and ring, c) his surname only, d) what was his name again?
3. Where the hell had everyone gone in Jonathan King’s 1965 OWH “Everyone’s Gone to the ____”? Were they at …
a) the disco, b) the hop, c) the sugar shack, d) the moon
4. In their 1970 OWH “One Toke Over the Line,” Brewer & Shipley were stuck momentarily in …
a) despair, b) Alice’s Restaurant, c) a railway station, d) Mobile with the Memphis Blues Again
5. The woman in Thomas Dolby’s 1982 OHW blinded Mr. Robertson (Mr. Dolby’s real name) with …
a) her tits, b) science, c) a ray gun, d) the truth
6. Everything but the Girl, who gave us the OHW “Missing” in 1996, took their name from a _______
a) furniture store advert, b) gay men’s club promotion, c) macabre children’s game, d) bucket list
7. The Baha Men, who came to and just as quickly left prominence with their 2000 OHW “Who Let the Dogs Out?” play a style of music known as
a) junkanoo, b) junk in your trunk, c) Christian calypso, d) MOR Negro
8. “Nothing Compares 2 U” was her 1990 OHW, and nothing certainly did. Soon she went batshit crazy and was served with restraining orders by several large cities. Her name is _______.
a) Amy Winehouse, b) Britney Spears, c) Lauren Hill, d) Sinead O’Connor
9. David Fenton, who wrote the OHW “Turning Japanese” (1980) for The Vapors, has denied that the song is about
a) turning Japanese, b) masturbation, c) Hiroshima birth defects, d) anything in particular
10. What color was the tambourine in The Lemon Pipers 1968 OHW “My Green Tambourine”?
a) chocolate/pesto, b) lemon, c) Sahara sandstone, d) green
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