postcards from the pug bus

postcards from the pug bus

lifting a leg on popular culture since 2004

. . . . . Only Jesus pardons more than Joe Biden . . . . . "The truth is hate to those who hate the truth." (Stormfront) . . . . . too many presenters on YouTube have faces made for radio . . . . . "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” (Eleanor Roosevelt) . . . . . a level playing field lifts no boats . . . . . the best arguments against reincarnation are first grade and first wives . . . . . familiarity breeds . . . . . whether you think you can or you can't, you're right . . . . . song stuck in local man's head wants out . . . . . the unexamined life is not worth examining . . . . . well begun is, well, begun . . . . . if it's statistically impossible, it's impossible . . . . . no one gives a shit about your pronouns . . . . . as one gets old, old times' sake is the only sake left . . . . . less is more only if more is out to lunch . . . . .
Pug Bus Pop Quiz

Prince Harry, Chelsy Davy Breakup Quiz

Chip Hilton 404 Views 2 min read

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Royal watchers have been off their HP Sauce since British tabloids began reporting over the weekend that Prince Harry and his current amuse-bouche, Chelsy Davy, have come a cropper—or cropped a comer, as the case may be. According to friends of the couple, Ms. Davy, 22, informed His Gingerness via text Read More

Sporting Life

Bynum Sitting Pretty for Philadelphia 76ers

philmaggitti 396 Views 2 min read

PHILADELPHIA – Despite knees that are as creaky as a forty-year-old Vietnamese prostitute’s, the Philadelphia 76ers recently acquired franchise center, Andrew Bynum, gave his team ten valuable minutes on the bench last night as the Sixers defeated the visiting Denver Nuggets 84-75 in the season opener for both teams.Mr. Bynum, 25, has not been able Read More

Sporting Life

Dwayne Wade Identified as Robbery Suspect

philmaggitti 422 Views 2 min read

PHILADELPHIA — A Korean grocery store owner has identified Dwayne Wade as the person who robbed him at gun point in early February. Woo-jin Park, 57, said he recognized Mr. Wade, 30, in a picture of the Miami Heat basketball team that was published on the internet via Twitter last week. In that photo members Read More

Sporting Life

How NBA Players Economized During the Lockout

philmaggitti 441 Views 2 min read

MIAMI – NBA players will finally report to training camps tomorrow to prepare for the 2011-2012 season, which begins December 25 this year, nearly two months later than usual. At the start of most NBA seasons, players report to camp eager to pimp the Hummers and Ferraris they bought during their summer vacations. This is Read More

Culture

The Grammar Prick Sticks It to Alanis Morissette

philmaggitti 410 Views 4 min read

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – When President Obama said that America had been “lazy” for the past few decades, he was talking about our national language scandal. Americans, the president said, are too lazy to search for the home run utterance; they settle instead for a cheap single up the middle; and that, boys and girls, Read More

Culture

Facebook Considering Fuckbook Spinoff

Chip Hilton 420 Views 2 min read

WEST CHESTER, Penna. – Surprised by some users’ reactions to the pornographic and violent images that appeared on Facebook recently, officials at the site are considering an adults-only version of Facebook, tentatively called Fuckbook. “To be honest,” said one Facebook official who asked to remain anonymous, “our site is the depository of dull. We’re nothing Read More