postcards from the pug bus

WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.–There is only one kind of person in the world. He who knows about Schrödinger’s cat, and he who doesn’t. For most of us, however, Schrödinger’s cat is a meme in search of a meaning. Chances are we have seen a reference to this elusive feline somewhere

WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.–We take no small measure of joy in knowing there are people in the world quietly going about undoing the work done by others in god’s name. The Universal Brotherhood of the Confrontational Atheist (UBCA) is one such group. We honor them by pausing to observe National

(Special to the Pug Bus from the Daily Lack of News) WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.–Our culture is obsessed with going the extra mile, giving 110 percent, leaving it all on the field. Supermarkets are open 24/7/365 to satisfy our shopping needs from A-to-Z, while athletes routinely crow about taking their

WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.–The most offensive joke in history, “The Aristocrats,” was weaponized in a 2005 documentary film directed by Paul Provenza and Penn Jillette, the talking member of Penn and Teller. By then “The Aristocrats” was at least fifty years old, and was a legendary after-hours joke that comedians

WEST GOSHEN, Pa.–Despite chowder heads’ insistence that conflate means “to confuse,” conflate means “to combine two or more texts, ideas, or fanciful stories into one.” A case in point is the Nativity story, popular this time of year. It combines the stories of Jesus’ birth, which are found only in the gospels

WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.—Regarding CBD oil, never has so much been swallowed by so many at such great cost to so little effect. Consequently Postcards from the Pug Bus are urging President Trump to sign an executive order at once making it illegal to manufacture, distribute, house, consume, possess, shelter,

WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.—Celiac disease affects 1 percent of normal Americans. When people with this inherited autoimmune disorder of the small intestine eat bread, pasta, muffins, or other foods containing gluten, their immune systems open up giant-economy-size cans of whup-ass on their persons. It isn’t pretty. It could be fatal.

NEW YORK–Concerned about the increasing rate of “irresponsible, negligent, and thoughtless behavior” exhibited by too many drivers, Toyota announced today that it is recalling 250,000 U.S. owners of RAV4, Corolla, Matrix, Avalon, Camry, Highlander, and Tundra models. “We have notified these persons by registered mail,” said Dennis E. Hamlin, vice

WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.—Pot is dead. Deader than a pile of stinking roaches in a dirty ashtray. Deader than Jerry Garcia. Deader than phone booths or analog clocks, the draft, or smoking on airplanes. Weed is, like, so 1973. So are rolling joints, the Rolling Stones, roach clips, cleaning bongs,

    By Phil Maggitti    Dec 17, 2019 – 4:07         EAST OPP, Ala.—The Lord God Almighty announced via Snapchat, Twitter, and Gab yesterday that he is going to load-manage Jesus during the next Hebrew year, 5781, which begins September 19, 2020, and ends on September 6, 2021. “Load management,” a

WEST GOSHEN TWP, Pa.—Trompe l’oeil (tromp LOY) or “trick of the eye” en français is the technique of using realistic imagery to create an optical illusion of depth and thereby fucking with people’s minds. The term originated with a trickster named Louis-Léopold Boilly (1761-1845), who used it as the title of a painting